Wishing Out Loud

Sometimes I wish I could strike up a conversation with the lady across from me on the train or give a hug to the young homeless boy on the street. Maybe even take down the lady’s number and meet up again for a cup of coffee or buy lunch for the poor boy. But there is something that puts a halt to my wishes-it’s thinking. I think too much. I think of the consequences of getting involved with strangers or being pick-pocketed by the young boy.

Ultimately, I wish I could just live free of any inhibitions or worry. I wish, I wish, I wish.

Any thoughts from all you people out there?…Help?

Soulmates

“One story about soulmates, presented by Aristophanes in Plato’s Symposium, is that humans originally consisted of four arms, four legs, and a single head made of two faces, but Zeus feared their power and split them all in half, condemning them to spend their lives searching for the other half to complete them:

‘[Primeval man] could walk upright as men now do, backwards or forwards as he pleased, and he could also roll over and over at a great pace, turning on his four hands and four feet, eight in all, like tumblers going over and over with their legs in the air; this was when he wanted to run fast …Terrible was their might and strength, and the thoughts of their hearts were great, and they made an attack upon the gods … Doubt reigned in the celestial councils. Should they kill them and annihilate the race with thunderbolts, as they had done the giants, then there would be an end of the sacrifices and worship which men offered to them; but, on the other hand, the gods could not suffer their insolence to be unrestrained. At last, after a good deal of reflection, Zeus discovered a way. He said: ‘Methinks I have a plan which will humble their pride and improve their manners; men shall continue to exist, but I will cut them in two and then they will be diminished in strength and increased in numbers; this will have the advantage of making them more profitable to us. They shall walk upright on two legs, and if they continue insolent and will not be quiet, I will split them again and they shall hop about on a single leg.’

—Aristophanes, Plato’s Symposium, [1]

The feet of Saint Guénolé (Winwaloe, Guignolé) statue, in a Prigny (Loire-Atlantique) chapel, are pierced with needles by local girls who hope to find their soulmates.

Some argue that souls are literally made and/or fated to be the mates of each other, or to play certain other important roles in each other’s lives[citation needed].

According to Theosophy, whose claims were modified by Edgar Cayce, God created androgynous souls, equally male and female. Later theories postulate that the souls split into separate genders, perhaps because they incurred karma while playing around on the Earth, or “separation from God”. Over a number of reincarnations, each half seeks the other. When all karmic debt is purged, the two will fuse back together and return to the ultimate.[2][3]”

LOOKBOOK.nu: “Rawr.” by Caitlin Grace

H & M Sparkly Navy Blue Tights, Forever 21 Distressed Jean Shorts, Silence + Noise Black Blazer from Urban Outfitters, Karen Kane Cheetah-print Tank from Thrift Store

via LOOKBOOK.nu: “Rawr.” by Caitlin Grace.

Flower Power

LIFE, December 26, 1969

(Life, December 26, 1969)

Flowers. They are something of such inexplicable beauty and strength. Representing life and all it’s beauty and glory while portraying its damning effects as it withers away, cracks, and crumbles. In a way, flowers can be compared to human beings but human beings lack the peacefulness flowers exude, only to be triumphed by chaos.

Pacifism \ˈpa-sə-ˌfi-zəm-
Function: noun
Etymology: French pacifisme, from pacifique pacific
Date: 1902

1 : opposition to war or violence as a means of settling disputes; specifically : refusal to bear arms on moral or religious grounds

2 : an attitude or policy of nonresistance

— pac·i·fist  -fist\ noun

There Was Something Tremulous In The Air

There was something tremulous in the air
Untouchable Air
The Angel rose and then she knelt
And frightened me with her majesty

In cold, warm air
Sorrow and comfort
Brought forth a vision
A vision bowing at my soul
Knifing at my heart

And there she was in swaddling clothes
And there she was silent, so full of life

This life scared me
And this silence deafened my ears

I brought forth my hands and cupped them
To receive the bitter water
Drowning my eyes

I relished in her presence
And
Thanked her breathless heart,
Her silent mind,
Her spirited soul

The Angel lifted my chin,
Tightened my belt,
Straightened my back,
And froze my heart

And so I went to the window
And watched the promise of rain,
Of warmth,
Of multicolored rainbows
And I hid the Angel (deep) in my heart.

LOOKBOOK.nu: Caitlin Grace

LOOKBOOK.nu: Caitlin Grace.

Junk Mail

This past weekend has been a flurry of cleaning house and preparation for my house guests. So of course I’ve been cleaning the only way I know how, throwing things away. My logic is that if you throw away all the “junk” and everything that you don’t use or care about anymore, it’ll make cleaning a small NYC apartment a much easier task. I have no attic, no basement, and storage units are not to be trusted so every little Mickey D’s Kids Meal toy, princesses dresses, and hello kitty journals are stacked and crushed into storage containers that take up much too much space.

In an attempt to be practical, I have hastily been throwing out old and useless junk, and giving away all of my Barbies and American Girl Dolls that the task has become so completely heartless. Severing any emotional attachment and sympathy for these remnants of days past.

I finally had to stop myself, take a deep breath and realize that perhaps all that is dubbed as “junk” is actually what makes you sane. “Junk” has the power to bring you back down to earth and to make you smile at your terrible, 1st grade grammatical errors, and the (rotting) lipstick that you couldn’t bear to live without. Personally, reading that little Hello Kitty journal which originated in 1st grade, may have been the best thing that has happened to me all day. So I’m sure that nobody wants to be a pack-rat but don’t throw away your junk before taking a second take.

Here is a little excerpt from that Hello Kitty journal; it’s the most embarrassing and cutest things I have ever read (Note: a few spelling adjustments were needed):

“Lacing flowers dye
Down two great cheers
Was now three she
Braced her hands
Backing up slowly till
She reaches the water

A curse was on her
She did not know she
Thought to herself that
Man is dreamy
(Note: Apparently juice spilled on the bottom half of the paper so I have to skip to the next page of the journal)

Married to that man the
Very next day”

Paradoxical

So, I should be preparing my lit essay and completing my 5 paged algebra homework but I have decided to enjoy the most recent copy of NYLON, read Aristotle’s Poetics, and drink a cup of chamomile tea. School’s fabulous but I’m more of a self-taught learner; driven by the curiosity to learn, not to ace the SAT’s (but you know, that would be nice too. yale drama is a beautiful prospect).BUT that’s not the point of this post; I’m being selfish. (Didn’t Schopenhauer say that everything we do as human beings is ultimately selfish, though?). Okay, I’ll shut up now.

The true intent of this post was to present to you a writing by the 14th Dalai Lama. I first came across this quote during my latest birthday when it showed up on a card from my father, perfectly rimmed with gold glitter on homemade creme colored paper. Ever since, this quote has become one of my favorites, summing up the pros & cons of a purely technological age. So without further adieu, I give you…

THE PARADOX OF OUR AGE–The 14th Dalai Lama

“We have bigger houses but smaller families;
More conveniences, but less time;
We have more degrees, but less sense;
More knowledge, but less judgment;
More experts, but more problems;
More medicines, but less healthiness;
We’ve been all the way to the moon and back,
but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.
We build more computers to hold more information to
produce more copies than ever but have less communication.
We have become long on quantity,
but short on quality.
These are times of fast foods but slow digestion;
Tall man but short character;
Steep profits but shallow relationships.
It’s a time when there is much in the window,
but nothing in the room.”

Modern Technology Owes Ecology An Apology

Oh, people in the 21st century…(sigh). Anything anybody’s interested in these days are the new “pea pods” or “tea books”. Now, many a “mature” being may have come across these grammatical mishaps given to the fact that they still probably think Lincoln is in office. Well, as these oldies resist, the younglings are practically more than welcoming. As I have just learned, from personal experience, these younger generations have become frighteningly dependent on these great technological feats, spending hours on Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, etc. Seeming to have some kind of hypnotizing component to it, technology is anything anybody cares about nowadays. What happened to curling up with a good ole book without a glaring light projecting from a digitally processed page? Or actually writing a letter and taking the time to send it, postage stamp and all instead of typing it up and sending it off in a matter of seconds?

Yesterday, because of complications with my WiFi network, I could not access the internet on my laptop. My frustration turned into hysteria which turned into me crying over not being able to check my Facebook page. Oh. My. God. I felt so incredibly silly afterwards, recounting my rant on how important it was that I check up on my page right that second. Not to mention that I had an audience as well, equipped with friends and family.

I suppose the “moral” of the story is that maybe one of these days you should trade up that eBook for an original (antique) copy of The Grapes of Wrath or that email for a piece of looseleaf and a pen. Bring yourself back down to earth, buy that horse and not that Prius.

“Western society has accepted as unquestionable a technological imperative that is quite as arbitrary as the most primitive taboo:  not merely the duty to foster invention and constantly to create technological novelties, but equally the duty to surrender to these novelties unconditionally, just because they are offered, without respect to their human consequences.”  ~Lewis Mumford

The Zodiac

Astrology. Is there really something to the stars, their alignment, what they can say about a person? It really is something to ponder when a guide to astrology tells you “enjoys freedom of thought and travel. will laugh about her misfortunes and mistakes, even while she is upset or in pain,” and they are spot on.

I can still remember the first time I got into astrology, not vividly, but vaguely enough. Sixth grade, thanksgiving break, Salem, Massachusetts. In this fateful town of Salem where the mystics gather and the wolf howls at the full moon, I came upon a minute, lamenated card that provided a short descriptions of each sign of the zodiac, planets and all. Completely hypnotized by this strange, alluring piece of plastic, I begged my parents to let me buy it even though they persisted to explain that it was a piece of crap. I defied their fine judgement and then began my journey into asking strangers what their zodiac sign was so I could study them for any noticeble traits. Then that Christmas, dear old “Santy Claus” bought me an array of guides to astrology and I read and read and studied and then studied some more. I worshiped the $12.95 remnants of trees and became completely dependent on them. I learned everything on my friends, my boy crushes, my family, and myself while signing up for daily horoscopes and weekly love horoscopes sent right to my e-mail; How convenient, right? However, as time went on my interest faded because it just didn’t feel concrete enough, accurate enough. Those daily horoscopes became a load of bullshit and no relationship ever blossomed for my poor, naive, romantic heart.

I came to my senses and concluded that astrology and your zodiac sign may give you a broad piece of mind concerning who you are but they cannot predict your life or the outcome of certain situations. Your life is in your hands and not in the interpretation of the stars. So I halted my subscriptions to daily horoscopes and weekly love predictions and I put my books away and I began to think for myself and  find my own way. I may enjoy travel but dear little stars, do you know where I’m going next?